I have just discovered this blog hop over at Story of a Girl and thought I would join in, although having only just come back to blogging after a bit of a hiatus I haven't posted much so thought I would actually do a TGIF post
This week seems to have been a very long one.
Work has not gone well, I seem to have wasted most of the child - free time I have managed to get which then gets me down, on one hand it's OK as I hit my monthly target for earnings a while ago so all additional work now is a bonus, but on the other hand my list of work jobs grows longer so I need to try and do some.
The kids are now bored of being off so are being more intolerant of each other and less able to amuse themselves, however only 1 week to go and next week is kind of a short week with the bank holidat as hubby will be around too and we can do something as a family, fingers crossed the weather stays good.
Last night we had the first sleepover which infact was very successful!
Tuesday I ran 8.5 miles which has given me a real boost. I am running The Great North Run for St Gemma's Hospice in Leeds and really need to send out another email to so called friends as only 6 people have sponsored me so far. I think the thing that grates about this are the number of ones I have sponsored who have ignored my email. I appreciate times are hard, but I am not asking for a lot and personally I feel as I have put my hand in my pocket for their cause, it may be nice for them to return the favour.
Having said I ran 8.5 miles, I planned 9 miles last night but have trapped a nerve in my neck and all movement is really painful so there is no way I can run which I am a bit gutted about, as its only 3 weeks until the day and I need to get up to 12 or 13 miles - eek
TGIF though as we are taking the boys away for a night this weekend and then spending Sunday with some old friends and I really can't wait. We are going back to Liverpool where we met, and I am really looking forward to it.
Friday, 23 August 2013
The Sleepover
Last night the boys had a friend stay for the first ever sleepover and I was pretty nervous and had a straw and bottle of wine lined up to see me through the night,
Mini man and Master J have been in the same class since reception (2 years now) and are known as the Terrible Two. Together they can be pretty naughty and cheeky and a real handful, neither are particularly good at sitting still or listening but they have a lovely friendship as they are so similar and egg each other on. When I say they are naughty, its never anything bad, more mischievous, however this year they have been separated and when they go back to school in September they will be in different classrooms which to be fair I don't think is a bad thing! master J cried about this apparently whereas Mini Man shrugged his shoulders when I told him and just said 'well I guess its because we are naughty together'.
Anyhow they have been begging for a sleepover for a long time and I eventually succumbed.
The excitement was high when we picked Master J up, so I took them straight to the Valley Garden's park to burn off some energy so 2 hours later they were marginally calmer. Even Little Man who now 3 years older than them at 9 was pretty excited. tea passed without mishap and I was amazed when at 7.30 I said it was time to get PJs on and they ran straight up and did it.
A little treat of decorating their own cupcake with smarties, marshmallows and chocolate buttons washed down with some milk as their 'midnight' feast in their beds was a good idea and then it was lights out. I hasten to add at this stage, they decorated the cakes in the kitchen then took them to their beds to eat!
I crept down the stairs with a little trepidation debating if there would be a need for me to actually sit in my office to keep an eye on them.
I only had to go up once and it was my 2 messing around, Master J was asleep by 9.15! I am gobsmacked that there was little noise (very loud whispering only), no teddy fights or pillow fights, no crying, no in and out of bed every 5 minutes, it went very smoothly.
To add to my delight, I heard them wake about 6.50am and Little Man gathering the 2 little ones up, took them downstairs and got them their breakfast! I got up to all 3 scoffing crunchy nut cornflakes round the table and they had even put mats out. They are now out bouncing on the trampoline so I think I may treat them and take them to the cinema to Madagascar 3 at the Odeon Kids club thing.
Little superstars
Mini man and Master J have been in the same class since reception (2 years now) and are known as the Terrible Two. Together they can be pretty naughty and cheeky and a real handful, neither are particularly good at sitting still or listening but they have a lovely friendship as they are so similar and egg each other on. When I say they are naughty, its never anything bad, more mischievous, however this year they have been separated and when they go back to school in September they will be in different classrooms which to be fair I don't think is a bad thing! master J cried about this apparently whereas Mini Man shrugged his shoulders when I told him and just said 'well I guess its because we are naughty together'.
Anyhow they have been begging for a sleepover for a long time and I eventually succumbed.
The excitement was high when we picked Master J up, so I took them straight to the Valley Garden's park to burn off some energy so 2 hours later they were marginally calmer. Even Little Man who now 3 years older than them at 9 was pretty excited. tea passed without mishap and I was amazed when at 7.30 I said it was time to get PJs on and they ran straight up and did it.
A little treat of decorating their own cupcake with smarties, marshmallows and chocolate buttons washed down with some milk as their 'midnight' feast in their beds was a good idea and then it was lights out. I hasten to add at this stage, they decorated the cakes in the kitchen then took them to their beds to eat!
I crept down the stairs with a little trepidation debating if there would be a need for me to actually sit in my office to keep an eye on them.
I only had to go up once and it was my 2 messing around, Master J was asleep by 9.15! I am gobsmacked that there was little noise (very loud whispering only), no teddy fights or pillow fights, no crying, no in and out of bed every 5 minutes, it went very smoothly.
To add to my delight, I heard them wake about 6.50am and Little Man gathering the 2 little ones up, took them downstairs and got them their breakfast! I got up to all 3 scoffing crunchy nut cornflakes round the table and they had even put mats out. They are now out bouncing on the trampoline so I think I may treat them and take them to the cinema to Madagascar 3 at the Odeon Kids club thing.
Little superstars
Thursday, 22 August 2013
Reasons to be Cheerful
I wouldn't even like to try and work out how long it is since I have taken part in this link! Been very slack but then I did have a bit of a blogging holiday for about 3 months so not surprising really
At the moment I feel I have loads to be cheerful about
At the moment I feel I have loads to be cheerful about
- Life was getting a little overwhelming with the amount of stuff I was trying to do, so I eventually realised that I needed to take a step back from everything which I did around April time and I feel as different again
- We have recently got back from our first proper holiday as a family since we had both boys so over 6 years since we had a holiday. It was Fab, it was a last minute deal, the resort wasn't that great, neither was the food, but did we care - no, the weather was perfect blue skies everyday, the kids lived in the sea or swimming pool which has done their water confidence no end of good, we hired a car and saw some of Majorca, Mini Man's dream came true by actually flying on an aeroplane, and Little Man learnt some Spanish. More importantly I think as a family we totally reconnected.
- Work is flowing in at the moment and I have the opportunity to go to Russia in October (VERY excited), plus for the first time in 3 years I have got the balance right - working mornings, every afternoon spent doing something with the boys.
- We are thinking about having a night away with the boys this bank holiday and then catching up with 2 sets of good friends so looking forward to that.
- Life is generally a much happier, more organised affair at the moment and I have finally accepted I am not superwoman and it is OK to sometimes say No.
Wednesday, 21 August 2013
Will power and weight loss
Before I had kids my weight never varied, I was 9 stone 3 and that was that.
Before kids I swam, I cycled, I went to the gym and I walked - hence maintaining my weight
Leading up to getting pregnant I changed my job which meant I needed a car to drive a couple of junctions up the motorway so the daily cycling and walking were gone.
I didn't put much weight on with my first - he was 9 weeks premature and had interuterine growth retardation so was too small for dates anyhow and at 31 weeks I wasn't even in maternity clothes.
What did change though was my diet. pre-pregnancy I are salad, fruit and veg daily and rarely had stodge. During pregnancy all I craved was stodge. Post pregnancy I struggled to express milk for tiny baby in SCBU and was told by some midwives that eating mars bars helped and I believed them and got into a daily mars bar pattern - in reality, I think a suckling baby as opposed to a milking parlour pump was the real key!
Again, I didn't actually put much weight on but my diet and what I wanted did, I suddenly found the idea of salads and veg didn't appeal anymore, I would go as far as to say I didn't even really like that type of food anymore.
Second pregnancy saw me in hospital from 25 weeks and VERY fed-up and I comforted myself on their steamed sticky toffee puddings and crisps as I got very fed-up of the hospital foods, so the vending machine and puddings were a must! Again I didn't put stones on but following boy 2 my weight crept up to 10 stone 2 and has fluctuated round there, between 9 stone 13 - 10 stone 3 for the past 6 years.
Over this time I have had zero will power, I always find an excuse to eat rubbish, comfort myself on sweets or chocolate, make the wrong choices 'oh well, I've fallen off the wagon today, I'll start again tomorrow'.
I've tried different things, increasing exercise again - difficult with working and the 2 boys, changing diet but hit the same problems of not wanting salads and veg, and decreasing portion size but then get hungry so snack.
My best friend has recently lost nearly 4 stone using weight watchers and the app on her phone and she convinced me to try it as well but to be honest I found it a bind to input everything that past my lips, would forget and then try and remember.
About 4 weeks ago I saw a tweet from her saying 'well bugger me, I have just squeezed my arse into a size 8'. SIZE 8, I have always been at least 1 if not 2 dress sizes smaller than her ever since we were about 11 so to read that was a real jolt and I don't know something clicked.
I am doing the Great North Run so training for that has really increased now, and suddenly I find myself reaching for the good foods and wanting them again. When I am struggling with the running and think I need to stop or slow, or change my route so it is not as long, I am literally chanting 'think of that size 8, think of that size 8' as I go and today I stood on the scales and it made me very happy
In 4 weeks I have lost 6lbs and am now the lowest I have been in 9 years - still not pre-children weight and I have the redistribution and flabby issues to resolve but I am making progress and it has made me even more determined now, given me a real boost - today I feel pretty amazing!
Before kids I swam, I cycled, I went to the gym and I walked - hence maintaining my weight
Leading up to getting pregnant I changed my job which meant I needed a car to drive a couple of junctions up the motorway so the daily cycling and walking were gone.
I didn't put much weight on with my first - he was 9 weeks premature and had interuterine growth retardation so was too small for dates anyhow and at 31 weeks I wasn't even in maternity clothes.
What did change though was my diet. pre-pregnancy I are salad, fruit and veg daily and rarely had stodge. During pregnancy all I craved was stodge. Post pregnancy I struggled to express milk for tiny baby in SCBU and was told by some midwives that eating mars bars helped and I believed them and got into a daily mars bar pattern - in reality, I think a suckling baby as opposed to a milking parlour pump was the real key!
Again, I didn't actually put much weight on but my diet and what I wanted did, I suddenly found the idea of salads and veg didn't appeal anymore, I would go as far as to say I didn't even really like that type of food anymore.
Second pregnancy saw me in hospital from 25 weeks and VERY fed-up and I comforted myself on their steamed sticky toffee puddings and crisps as I got very fed-up of the hospital foods, so the vending machine and puddings were a must! Again I didn't put stones on but following boy 2 my weight crept up to 10 stone 2 and has fluctuated round there, between 9 stone 13 - 10 stone 3 for the past 6 years.
Over this time I have had zero will power, I always find an excuse to eat rubbish, comfort myself on sweets or chocolate, make the wrong choices 'oh well, I've fallen off the wagon today, I'll start again tomorrow'.
I've tried different things, increasing exercise again - difficult with working and the 2 boys, changing diet but hit the same problems of not wanting salads and veg, and decreasing portion size but then get hungry so snack.
My best friend has recently lost nearly 4 stone using weight watchers and the app on her phone and she convinced me to try it as well but to be honest I found it a bind to input everything that past my lips, would forget and then try and remember.
About 4 weeks ago I saw a tweet from her saying 'well bugger me, I have just squeezed my arse into a size 8'. SIZE 8, I have always been at least 1 if not 2 dress sizes smaller than her ever since we were about 11 so to read that was a real jolt and I don't know something clicked.
I am doing the Great North Run so training for that has really increased now, and suddenly I find myself reaching for the good foods and wanting them again. When I am struggling with the running and think I need to stop or slow, or change my route so it is not as long, I am literally chanting 'think of that size 8, think of that size 8' as I go and today I stood on the scales and it made me very happy
In 4 weeks I have lost 6lbs and am now the lowest I have been in 9 years - still not pre-children weight and I have the redistribution and flabby issues to resolve but I am making progress and it has made me even more determined now, given me a real boost - today I feel pretty amazing!
Tuesday, 20 August 2013
This is My Child Campaign
I have just been reading on Mumsnet about the 'This is my Child Campaign'
I can't express how much I am behind it. After years of having a mis-understood child and feeling the isolation and stigma that goes with a child with a hidden disability it is a relief to see there is a campaign out there to raise awareness.
My own son has ADHD and mild autism. I have found that ADHD in itself carries a huge stigma and that I struggle to find other parents who admit their child has it or want to talk about it. It is part of my son, it makes him who he is. Yes life can be hard with him and as he gets older I am sure it will get harder but under the noise, screeching, running around, and general all over the place-ness, there is a very sensitive, loving boy who would go to the ends of this earth to help someone - no-one ever gives him the chance to see that person.
I hold my hands up and say we have him on medication - very much against what we believed in but hey we were wrong and within 2 weeks of starting a trial of medication we realised not only had it changed his life but our family life as well, it was the best move we ever made, people now 'see' our son, people understand him better. He actually asks for the tablets and says without them his brain whizzes round his head and he doesn't like it. its his choice and always will be. One thing medicating the ADHD did do though was allow the autistic traits to come to the surface, they were real and needed addressing but he will get on fine in life with them, with a little understanding.
Before we had diagnosis' we were labelled as parents who didn't discipline, parents who couldn't cope, a mother who shouldn't work and then perhaps her son wouldn't cry out for so much attention, a son who was a nightmare, a bully, always to blame (when often he wasn't but even at 4 and 5 yrs old other kids would blame him until one day he got the blame and wasn't even in school which made the teachers realise what was going on), always on the outside, never invited to parties, never invited to tea - it is simply heart-breaking, isolating and soul destroying all rolled into one. I stopped going anywhere for fear of how we would be viewed which I can tell you does nothing for your own self esteem and confidence, infact it destroys them.
The times I struggled with a baby while trying to sort my 3 or 4 year old out because he was doing something inappropriate, never once did someone ask if I needed help, but were all too happy to watch me struggle, and stare, or drag their own child away. The times I sat and cried alone, or with a screaming baby and pinned down toddler but still no-one asked if we were alright.
Please get behind this campaign and support it.
The below is copied from the This is my Child Campaign website
Hello,
As lots of you will already know, we've spent the last few months working on a new campaign called 'This Is My Child' - and it's launching on Monday. (We're letting you know about it now because there's a rather nice piece about in in the Guardian this weekend.)
You can read about the background to the campaign here, but in essence it's about myth-busting and awareness-raising - so we'd really love you all to share it as widely as possible. We've consulted with Mumsnetters and the material is supported by input from some of the leading charities in the field: Mencap, Contact A Family and Every Disabled Child Matters.
Over the years on Mumsnet, parents of children with SN have described how their lives are made more difficult by the occasional (or not-so-occasional) judginess of members of the public. They've described how this can contribute to their isolation, placing limits on their social opportunities because they can't face the stress and disapproval that comes with public interactions.
That's why we came up with This Is My Child. Its aim is to support parents of children with additional needs, inform everyone else, and open up a conversation about how we can all act together to make day-to-day life a bit easier for these families.
The input of parents caring for children with special needs has always provided a fascinating perspective for other MNers, encouraging empathy and giving real insight into what life can be like. We're hoping that our myth-busters, tips for non-experts and strategies for parents and carers, along with our background facts and figures, will help to bring the wisdom and perspective of Mumsnet SN posters to a wider audience.
So if you like what you read and think someone you know would find it interesting or useful, please share it as widely as you can (you'll find our impressively large sharing buttons on each page ).
And for the Tweeps among you, we'll be holding a Twitter party on the #ThisIsMyChild hashtag on Tuesday between 1pm and 2pm; please join in if you can.
As ever, we'd love to know your thoughts and hear your feedback, so please use this thread to post up anything that occurs to you.
Thanks
MNHQ
I can't express how much I am behind it. After years of having a mis-understood child and feeling the isolation and stigma that goes with a child with a hidden disability it is a relief to see there is a campaign out there to raise awareness.
My own son has ADHD and mild autism. I have found that ADHD in itself carries a huge stigma and that I struggle to find other parents who admit their child has it or want to talk about it. It is part of my son, it makes him who he is. Yes life can be hard with him and as he gets older I am sure it will get harder but under the noise, screeching, running around, and general all over the place-ness, there is a very sensitive, loving boy who would go to the ends of this earth to help someone - no-one ever gives him the chance to see that person.
I hold my hands up and say we have him on medication - very much against what we believed in but hey we were wrong and within 2 weeks of starting a trial of medication we realised not only had it changed his life but our family life as well, it was the best move we ever made, people now 'see' our son, people understand him better. He actually asks for the tablets and says without them his brain whizzes round his head and he doesn't like it. its his choice and always will be. One thing medicating the ADHD did do though was allow the autistic traits to come to the surface, they were real and needed addressing but he will get on fine in life with them, with a little understanding.
Before we had diagnosis' we were labelled as parents who didn't discipline, parents who couldn't cope, a mother who shouldn't work and then perhaps her son wouldn't cry out for so much attention, a son who was a nightmare, a bully, always to blame (when often he wasn't but even at 4 and 5 yrs old other kids would blame him until one day he got the blame and wasn't even in school which made the teachers realise what was going on), always on the outside, never invited to parties, never invited to tea - it is simply heart-breaking, isolating and soul destroying all rolled into one. I stopped going anywhere for fear of how we would be viewed which I can tell you does nothing for your own self esteem and confidence, infact it destroys them.
The times I struggled with a baby while trying to sort my 3 or 4 year old out because he was doing something inappropriate, never once did someone ask if I needed help, but were all too happy to watch me struggle, and stare, or drag their own child away. The times I sat and cried alone, or with a screaming baby and pinned down toddler but still no-one asked if we were alright.
Please get behind this campaign and support it.
The below is copied from the This is my Child Campaign website
Hello,
As lots of you will already know, we've spent the last few months working on a new campaign called 'This Is My Child' - and it's launching on Monday. (We're letting you know about it now because there's a rather nice piece about in in the Guardian this weekend.)
You can read about the background to the campaign here, but in essence it's about myth-busting and awareness-raising - so we'd really love you all to share it as widely as possible. We've consulted with Mumsnetters and the material is supported by input from some of the leading charities in the field: Mencap, Contact A Family and Every Disabled Child Matters.
Over the years on Mumsnet, parents of children with SN have described how their lives are made more difficult by the occasional (or not-so-occasional) judginess of members of the public. They've described how this can contribute to their isolation, placing limits on their social opportunities because they can't face the stress and disapproval that comes with public interactions.
That's why we came up with This Is My Child. Its aim is to support parents of children with additional needs, inform everyone else, and open up a conversation about how we can all act together to make day-to-day life a bit easier for these families.
The input of parents caring for children with special needs has always provided a fascinating perspective for other MNers, encouraging empathy and giving real insight into what life can be like. We're hoping that our myth-busters, tips for non-experts and strategies for parents and carers, along with our background facts and figures, will help to bring the wisdom and perspective of Mumsnet SN posters to a wider audience.
So if you like what you read and think someone you know would find it interesting or useful, please share it as widely as you can (you'll find our impressively large sharing buttons on each page ).
And for the Tweeps among you, we'll be holding a Twitter party on the #ThisIsMyChild hashtag on Tuesday between 1pm and 2pm; please join in if you can.
As ever, we'd love to know your thoughts and hear your feedback, so please use this thread to post up anything that occurs to you.
Thanks
MNHQ
Hormones and body odour
Nice sounding title for a blog post!
However, my eldest son must have suddenly hit a growth spurt or rather a growing up spurt. He is only 9 but the last few days I have smelt that distinctive BO smell from his right armpit, the left one is obviously a little behind as that still seems fine.
I mean he is 9, I am sure I didn't start using deodorant until I was over 11 and in senior school but perhaps boys are different, maybe I should see if my brother or mum remembers when he started using deodorant. Hubby cant remember when he did.
It has sent me a little off kilter though, he's 9 and suddenly needing deodorant, it seems such a big step out of the little boy domain into becoming a young man domain and although he is more than ready for it, it has made me wonder if I am as it makes me feel all nostalgic and sad! Stupid woman I know.
So what deodorant do you buy a child because at 9 he is still a child, I certainly don't want him wearing things like linx and smelling to high heaven, do you buy them roll on's or spray deodorant - I have no idea! I feel we need to be delicate about how we discuss this with him, as he is mildly autistic and has issues with using soap anyway. We are lucky in that he is happy to shower daily but he doesn't like the consistency of soap or shower gel or shampoo and I need to hover in the doorway to ensure he actually using it and then rubs it in rather than squirting a tiny bit on his hands, letting the water wash it off and then skimming his hands over the important bits. With these body changes though, other changes may well be on the horizon and it may no longer be alright for me to be hovering, and ensuring this is being done. By the time he showers, hubby is on his way to work. For the most part we need to employ 'over learning' with him so I guess this will be the same but at the same time you want to be sensitive to their feelings and approach it in a delicate way.
Are any other 9 year olds going through this, I need to find out from other mum's, with him being a loner, he doesn't have a big circle of friends so we don't tend to see people through the holidays.
I wonder if this means his hormones will be starting to kick in soon, if other things will be about to start happening in the near future, this could be the start of a new interesting/stressful period in our lives. It also makes me realise that living in a 3 bedroomed house, where the boys choose to share a room and the third small bedroom is my office, may be all about to change, as I am sure with this 'growing up' and body changes will also come more independence and less tolerance of the little brother and a need for his own space.
So as little Man enters year 5, I think he is also entering a new period of his life involving body changes and hormones - they seem to grow up so quickly (and yes I am sure our parents said the same).
However, my eldest son must have suddenly hit a growth spurt or rather a growing up spurt. He is only 9 but the last few days I have smelt that distinctive BO smell from his right armpit, the left one is obviously a little behind as that still seems fine.
I mean he is 9, I am sure I didn't start using deodorant until I was over 11 and in senior school but perhaps boys are different, maybe I should see if my brother or mum remembers when he started using deodorant. Hubby cant remember when he did.
It has sent me a little off kilter though, he's 9 and suddenly needing deodorant, it seems such a big step out of the little boy domain into becoming a young man domain and although he is more than ready for it, it has made me wonder if I am as it makes me feel all nostalgic and sad! Stupid woman I know.
So what deodorant do you buy a child because at 9 he is still a child, I certainly don't want him wearing things like linx and smelling to high heaven, do you buy them roll on's or spray deodorant - I have no idea! I feel we need to be delicate about how we discuss this with him, as he is mildly autistic and has issues with using soap anyway. We are lucky in that he is happy to shower daily but he doesn't like the consistency of soap or shower gel or shampoo and I need to hover in the doorway to ensure he actually using it and then rubs it in rather than squirting a tiny bit on his hands, letting the water wash it off and then skimming his hands over the important bits. With these body changes though, other changes may well be on the horizon and it may no longer be alright for me to be hovering, and ensuring this is being done. By the time he showers, hubby is on his way to work. For the most part we need to employ 'over learning' with him so I guess this will be the same but at the same time you want to be sensitive to their feelings and approach it in a delicate way.
Are any other 9 year olds going through this, I need to find out from other mum's, with him being a loner, he doesn't have a big circle of friends so we don't tend to see people through the holidays.
I wonder if this means his hormones will be starting to kick in soon, if other things will be about to start happening in the near future, this could be the start of a new interesting/stressful period in our lives. It also makes me realise that living in a 3 bedroomed house, where the boys choose to share a room and the third small bedroom is my office, may be all about to change, as I am sure with this 'growing up' and body changes will also come more independence and less tolerance of the little brother and a need for his own space.
So as little Man enters year 5, I think he is also entering a new period of his life involving body changes and hormones - they seem to grow up so quickly (and yes I am sure our parents said the same).
Monday, 19 August 2013
Great North Run Training
I am trying really hard to be dedicated and train properly for the Great North Run which as I have mentioned I am running in aid of St Gemma's hospice in Leeds in memory of my late Uncle.
I ran the Edinburgh half marathon last year and although I tried to train, illness and time were against me and truth be told my longest run before the event was 5 miles, so I amazed myself when I got round the full course in 2.36 minutes and ran the majority - it is amazing what a crowd, atmosphere and adrenalin can do!
This time though I would like to better the 2.36 and improve on it all so I set out with a proper training plan - well I say a training plan it was all in my head, but I knew what I wanted to achieve and my timelines.
In the last 2 weeks I have increased my distance from 6 miles to 8.5 miles which is the most I have ever done (other than the half marathon last year of course).
I am running 3 times a week and going to the gym or swimming on days inbetween with either a Friday or Sunday off as my day of rest.
Truth be told, I am struggling initially. I set off and find the first 3 miles really touch, I try and always run uphill to start with and always end up having to interval (walk 1 lamppost before I can set off again), but then I seem to break a barrier and can keep on going.
I recently invested in new running shoes from Up and Running which are very nice (at £95 I should hope they are though!), and hubby said to me on Saturday when I achieved my 8.5 miles
'How do you feel, you are a proper runner now'
That was a real realisation - I am! I love it as well!
Anyone who knew me at school and saw my pathetic crawls round the cross country track, I was always one of the last would not believe it, I hardly do myself
So tomorrow I intend to go for 9.5 miles, wish me luck!
I ran the Edinburgh half marathon last year and although I tried to train, illness and time were against me and truth be told my longest run before the event was 5 miles, so I amazed myself when I got round the full course in 2.36 minutes and ran the majority - it is amazing what a crowd, atmosphere and adrenalin can do!
This time though I would like to better the 2.36 and improve on it all so I set out with a proper training plan - well I say a training plan it was all in my head, but I knew what I wanted to achieve and my timelines.
In the last 2 weeks I have increased my distance from 6 miles to 8.5 miles which is the most I have ever done (other than the half marathon last year of course).
I am running 3 times a week and going to the gym or swimming on days inbetween with either a Friday or Sunday off as my day of rest.
Truth be told, I am struggling initially. I set off and find the first 3 miles really touch, I try and always run uphill to start with and always end up having to interval (walk 1 lamppost before I can set off again), but then I seem to break a barrier and can keep on going.
I recently invested in new running shoes from Up and Running which are very nice (at £95 I should hope they are though!), and hubby said to me on Saturday when I achieved my 8.5 miles
'How do you feel, you are a proper runner now'
That was a real realisation - I am! I love it as well!
Anyone who knew me at school and saw my pathetic crawls round the cross country track, I was always one of the last would not believe it, I hardly do myself
So tomorrow I intend to go for 9.5 miles, wish me luck!
Saturday, 17 August 2013
Snail sitting
How traumatic do you think looking after a little girl's pet snail while she is on holiday can be?
Well let me tell you.
Last week my boys got asked if they would look after Mrs Snail (giant African land snail) for Miss P while she goes on her holiday. They had only had her a week but hey how difficult can it be to spray a snail twice a day, her tank and soil to keep it moist and humid and put lettuce and cucumber in twice a day, even I can cope with that!
The responsibility I felt though when on day 3 she disappeared. I wondered if we had a Houdini on our hands as the tank was shut and she had been there when I went to bed and I was the first up, although I do admit to checking the dog's bed for snail shell fragments! How can a snail disappear?
By burrowing, that's how. We eventually found her by gently digging through the soil, so I left her thinking she was sleeping. When she hasn't materialized by that night or eaten I got really concerned she had buried herself to die so located her again and gave her shell a very gentle tug, there was still suction so I calculated she must still be alive. Two days later though I was at my wits end, how was I going to tell a 6 year old her pet was dead which she had only had a week?
Day 6 I got up to find Mrs Snail had eventually moved, still burrowed deep but moved nonetheless and was sitting on 100's of tiny white balls. Initial thoughts included the boys trying to feed her polystyrene balls from the bean bags, however a quick consult of the oracle that is Google confirmed said balls to be eggs usually in numbers of 200-300. Further research suggested these could all possibly hatch and I should humanly destroy them.
Who would have thought a snail could cause so much trauma. Not feeling like I could do this without consulting the owners the boys saw the eggs and quickly determined by themselves what they were, so tears were shed when I explained I would have to remove them. Speaking of which I really need to remove them from my freezer now as they only need 48 hours to no longer be viable.
I am also pleased to report no further eggs were laid while under our care and she returned home alive and active.
Well let me tell you.
Last week my boys got asked if they would look after Mrs Snail (giant African land snail) for Miss P while she goes on her holiday. They had only had her a week but hey how difficult can it be to spray a snail twice a day, her tank and soil to keep it moist and humid and put lettuce and cucumber in twice a day, even I can cope with that!
The responsibility I felt though when on day 3 she disappeared. I wondered if we had a Houdini on our hands as the tank was shut and she had been there when I went to bed and I was the first up, although I do admit to checking the dog's bed for snail shell fragments! How can a snail disappear?
By burrowing, that's how. We eventually found her by gently digging through the soil, so I left her thinking she was sleeping. When she hasn't materialized by that night or eaten I got really concerned she had buried herself to die so located her again and gave her shell a very gentle tug, there was still suction so I calculated she must still be alive. Two days later though I was at my wits end, how was I going to tell a 6 year old her pet was dead which she had only had a week?
Day 6 I got up to find Mrs Snail had eventually moved, still burrowed deep but moved nonetheless and was sitting on 100's of tiny white balls. Initial thoughts included the boys trying to feed her polystyrene balls from the bean bags, however a quick consult of the oracle that is Google confirmed said balls to be eggs usually in numbers of 200-300. Further research suggested these could all possibly hatch and I should humanly destroy them.
Who would have thought a snail could cause so much trauma. Not feeling like I could do this without consulting the owners the boys saw the eggs and quickly determined by themselves what they were, so tears were shed when I explained I would have to remove them. Speaking of which I really need to remove them from my freezer now as they only need 48 hours to no longer be viable.
I am also pleased to report no further eggs were laid while under our care and she returned home alive and active.
Friday, 9 August 2013
Does blogging depress you?
Do you know, I think blogging actually makes me feel low and down in the dumps and quite frankly leaves me feeling a tad depressed?
Does that sound weird?
Am I alone in this?
let me explain. I started blogging probably as a release and probably as I felt quite isolated and lonely. I 'met' some lovely people, I gained followers, I interacted with people, but then I found if I blogged and didn't get comments or reads I felt really down, as if no-one cared, and found I was obsessively checking to see if anyone found me interesting.
I still blogged though for a couple of years and it has really helped me through some tough times even though I didn't specifically blog about them. Certain people like the crew from GroovyMum and Sarah Mac and BareNakedMummy to name a few have been a huge support.
I recently took a long break and in that time I not only took a step back from blogging but a lot of other things to and I have felt like a different person, much happier, much more sociable, much more relaxed despite a hectic work schedule which I am struggling to juggle over the summer.
The other day I decided it was high time to check back in and get back to blogging but 4 days back in and I have spent today as low as they come. The boys are in kids club so I could do some work but instead I have procrastinated all day, arsed around, done fuck all really other than sit with stupid scenarios playing in my head something I have not done for months and months.
Is it a coincidence that this has happened once I start blogging again or is it simply due to lack of sleep last night (as the boys were going to bed there was a horrendous smell of burning from within the house which we couldn't locate, and it eventually went by itself, I think it may have been a moth that got too close to a light but I don't know. Anyhow our smoke detector is wired into the electrics and I spent all night wondering how we would know if it was working or not, after all we never test it, we were told we didn't need to).
So does blogging actually depress me? I am not sure.....
Does that sound weird?
Am I alone in this?
let me explain. I started blogging probably as a release and probably as I felt quite isolated and lonely. I 'met' some lovely people, I gained followers, I interacted with people, but then I found if I blogged and didn't get comments or reads I felt really down, as if no-one cared, and found I was obsessively checking to see if anyone found me interesting.
I still blogged though for a couple of years and it has really helped me through some tough times even though I didn't specifically blog about them. Certain people like the crew from GroovyMum and Sarah Mac and BareNakedMummy to name a few have been a huge support.
I recently took a long break and in that time I not only took a step back from blogging but a lot of other things to and I have felt like a different person, much happier, much more sociable, much more relaxed despite a hectic work schedule which I am struggling to juggle over the summer.
The other day I decided it was high time to check back in and get back to blogging but 4 days back in and I have spent today as low as they come. The boys are in kids club so I could do some work but instead I have procrastinated all day, arsed around, done fuck all really other than sit with stupid scenarios playing in my head something I have not done for months and months.
Is it a coincidence that this has happened once I start blogging again or is it simply due to lack of sleep last night (as the boys were going to bed there was a horrendous smell of burning from within the house which we couldn't locate, and it eventually went by itself, I think it may have been a moth that got too close to a light but I don't know. Anyhow our smoke detector is wired into the electrics and I spent all night wondering how we would know if it was working or not, after all we never test it, we were told we didn't need to).
So does blogging actually depress me? I am not sure.....
Thursday, 8 August 2013
Frustration
I have been very frustrated the last 2 days, the idea was I would work mornings and spend every afternoon with the boys, I was determined this summer I would be gathering them together at 4pm and dashing out for an hour or 2 in order to feel like I had still done something with them.
Monday these plans fell through as I had a massive last minute bit of work come in Friday 2ndm which was very lucrative, means if I get nothing else for the rest of August all will be OK and could lead to more work. As a result I ended up working all day and doing the 4pm thing.
Tuesday worked out fine and we went to the cinema in the morning and had a lovely lunch and walk together.
Wednesday was a nightmare Boy1 at 9 is happy to play with his Lego, he tries it on with having game time but knows when I mean no. Boy 2 though at 6 would not leave me alone. I run a time tracking programme for when I am working so when I invoice different companies I can give them proper hours and a copy of time spent on their projects. I ran a report yesterday and I only achieved 2.5 hours work all day. I tried walking away, going for a bike ride with the kids and coming back to it but Boy2 was at my side 'I'm bored, I'm bored, I'm bored, can we paint my plane?, can we build a space station? can we bake?' All I end up doing is getting stressed and doing these things to appease him.
I am desperate for them to play out more but they bore of each others company in the garden I think, so that only lasts 10 minutes or so. I keep trying to encourage them to play on the drive and in the front garden as other kids tend to be attracted and we have other kids on the road, but they stray onto next doors drive (it is shared and she gets funny about it, he doesn't seem to mind, but she does), plus we live on quite a busy side road, people use it as a cut through and although we have wide pavements and verges I don't want Boy 2 straying too far.
Today my Dad bless him had them for the afternoon.
The house though is a pig sty, and I am getting nowhere with tidying it, I HAVE to do this as I cant cope much more with the mess, or not being able to find anything.
I planned to try for a 7 mile run tonight - furthest yet ekkk. Plan was to be ready for when Hubby got in from work at 6,45 but a friend came round and I didn't even start the boys tea until 7pm, then hubby wanted food, then boys wanted me to put them to bed, then I got the washing in (4 loads), and couldn't even find my running trousers so at 8.15 I gave in on the idea of a run so am feeling frustrated.
I am also a little depressed that I need to raise £300 for the charity I am running the Great North Run for and sent out my fund raising details to all I know and posted the link on Facebook and it has generated one £10.00 donation. I know times are hard and I totally understand but what does bug me, is many of the people I sent to (and I was careful with who I asked), are people I have bothered to sponsor this year as well, and kind of hoped for the same in return. Oh well there is still time I guess.
Tomorrow is a new day, the boys are going to the wet and wild event at kids club so I get a full day of peace!
Monday these plans fell through as I had a massive last minute bit of work come in Friday 2ndm which was very lucrative, means if I get nothing else for the rest of August all will be OK and could lead to more work. As a result I ended up working all day and doing the 4pm thing.
Tuesday worked out fine and we went to the cinema in the morning and had a lovely lunch and walk together.
Wednesday was a nightmare Boy1 at 9 is happy to play with his Lego, he tries it on with having game time but knows when I mean no. Boy 2 though at 6 would not leave me alone. I run a time tracking programme for when I am working so when I invoice different companies I can give them proper hours and a copy of time spent on their projects. I ran a report yesterday and I only achieved 2.5 hours work all day. I tried walking away, going for a bike ride with the kids and coming back to it but Boy2 was at my side 'I'm bored, I'm bored, I'm bored, can we paint my plane?, can we build a space station? can we bake?' All I end up doing is getting stressed and doing these things to appease him.
I am desperate for them to play out more but they bore of each others company in the garden I think, so that only lasts 10 minutes or so. I keep trying to encourage them to play on the drive and in the front garden as other kids tend to be attracted and we have other kids on the road, but they stray onto next doors drive (it is shared and she gets funny about it, he doesn't seem to mind, but she does), plus we live on quite a busy side road, people use it as a cut through and although we have wide pavements and verges I don't want Boy 2 straying too far.
Today my Dad bless him had them for the afternoon.
The house though is a pig sty, and I am getting nowhere with tidying it, I HAVE to do this as I cant cope much more with the mess, or not being able to find anything.
I planned to try for a 7 mile run tonight - furthest yet ekkk. Plan was to be ready for when Hubby got in from work at 6,45 but a friend came round and I didn't even start the boys tea until 7pm, then hubby wanted food, then boys wanted me to put them to bed, then I got the washing in (4 loads), and couldn't even find my running trousers so at 8.15 I gave in on the idea of a run so am feeling frustrated.
I am also a little depressed that I need to raise £300 for the charity I am running the Great North Run for and sent out my fund raising details to all I know and posted the link on Facebook and it has generated one £10.00 donation. I know times are hard and I totally understand but what does bug me, is many of the people I sent to (and I was careful with who I asked), are people I have bothered to sponsor this year as well, and kind of hoped for the same in return. Oh well there is still time I guess.
Tomorrow is a new day, the boys are going to the wet and wild event at kids club so I get a full day of peace!
Wednesday, 7 August 2013
The Great North Run Training
In April of this year, I sadly lost my Uncle quite suddenly to that bastard Cancer.
I say suddenly, maybe about 10 years ago he was diagnosed with oesophageal cancer and underwent surgery and chemotherapy for 6 months and he has been in remission since. He then had yearly checkups which in more recent years moved to 3 yearly, although he had an open access agreement with his consultant that if he felt another check up was needed sooner he could request one and would be seen.
In the New Year, he told my Dad (his older brother by a year), that he wasn't feeling right and although he wasn't overly concerned he was going to go to the Doctors, just a few niggley pains. His doctor ran blood test which all came back fine, but said he would organise an appointment with my Uncle's old consultant to put his mind at rest. He was got an appointment through for mid February but before he attended he collapsed at home with severe stomach ache.
This turned out to be a huge blockage in his bowel causing an obstruction which they operated on as an emergency and ended up having to remove the whole of my Uncle's bowel leaving him with a colostomy bag. Scans done at the time also revealed 'unknown growths' in his liver. No-one at this stage had said cancer but we all knew. He was very poorly after the surgery and ended up getting infection after infection at the site of the colostomy bag, which left him weaker and weaker.
After 3 weeks the decision was taken for him to return home as he was well enough with daily care, the aim being to get him strong enough to start chemotherapy as soon as possible.
2 weeks later he was admitted to St Gemma's Hospice in Leeds for reassessment - the nurses assured him and his family they were only admitting him for 24 hours in order to do the assessments so a new treatment plan could be initiated quicker for him. If they made a hospital appointment for him, it would take time and the ultimate goal was to get him stronger so he could start treatment as soon as possible.
Less than 24 hours later, he passed away while in St Gemma's peacefully with his family around him.
We were all shocked and devastated. In the space of 6 weeks, an active, bird loving, caring man had been claimed by cancer.
Although only in St Gemma's for a short period of time, the care both my Uncle and his family received went above and beyond the expected, the aftercare of the family as well.
In his memory, I am running The Great North Run to try and raise £350.00 towards St Gemma's so they can continue to help other families out there.
Please, please if you feel you can help, sponsor me and help me reach this target
I am training quite hard at the moment and was pleased that I ran 6.6 miles last night in an hour when I felt I was really out of condition.
I plan to write a little weekly training log to keep me motivated.
I ran the Edinburgh half last April and did it in 2 hours 35 minutes so ideally would like to better my time.
I say suddenly, maybe about 10 years ago he was diagnosed with oesophageal cancer and underwent surgery and chemotherapy for 6 months and he has been in remission since. He then had yearly checkups which in more recent years moved to 3 yearly, although he had an open access agreement with his consultant that if he felt another check up was needed sooner he could request one and would be seen.
In the New Year, he told my Dad (his older brother by a year), that he wasn't feeling right and although he wasn't overly concerned he was going to go to the Doctors, just a few niggley pains. His doctor ran blood test which all came back fine, but said he would organise an appointment with my Uncle's old consultant to put his mind at rest. He was got an appointment through for mid February but before he attended he collapsed at home with severe stomach ache.
This turned out to be a huge blockage in his bowel causing an obstruction which they operated on as an emergency and ended up having to remove the whole of my Uncle's bowel leaving him with a colostomy bag. Scans done at the time also revealed 'unknown growths' in his liver. No-one at this stage had said cancer but we all knew. He was very poorly after the surgery and ended up getting infection after infection at the site of the colostomy bag, which left him weaker and weaker.
After 3 weeks the decision was taken for him to return home as he was well enough with daily care, the aim being to get him strong enough to start chemotherapy as soon as possible.
2 weeks later he was admitted to St Gemma's Hospice in Leeds for reassessment - the nurses assured him and his family they were only admitting him for 24 hours in order to do the assessments so a new treatment plan could be initiated quicker for him. If they made a hospital appointment for him, it would take time and the ultimate goal was to get him stronger so he could start treatment as soon as possible.
Less than 24 hours later, he passed away while in St Gemma's peacefully with his family around him.
We were all shocked and devastated. In the space of 6 weeks, an active, bird loving, caring man had been claimed by cancer.
Although only in St Gemma's for a short period of time, the care both my Uncle and his family received went above and beyond the expected, the aftercare of the family as well.
In his memory, I am running The Great North Run to try and raise £350.00 towards St Gemma's so they can continue to help other families out there.
Please, please if you feel you can help, sponsor me and help me reach this target
I am training quite hard at the moment and was pleased that I ran 6.6 miles last night in an hour when I felt I was really out of condition.
I plan to write a little weekly training log to keep me motivated.
I ran the Edinburgh half last April and did it in 2 hours 35 minutes so ideally would like to better my time.
Tuesday, 6 August 2013
Working
So today I am at the point of chucking the boys into the garden despite their protests and giving in to the dog charging round it with them, peeing on the grass, ruining the new grass and leaving piles of stuff for me to then pick up before one of the kids treads in it and trials it into the house.
I work, and if I say so myself I work hard. I work from home though for myself and most days sees me shut away in the little bedroom aka my office beavering away.
Childcare costs money, so we avoid it where we can, plus they both now find kids club really boring. At 9 and 6 the kids are pretty self sufficient and this year I was determined not to fall into the same trap as last year and work everyday of the holiday and then at 4.00pm rush out of the door with them in an attempt to feel like we had 'done' something.
This summer's plan was to work mornings, as I get up about 6am and make a start so 6-12.00 is a reasonable working day, boys get up 8.00ish and tend to amuse themselves. Then the afternoons are ours to wile away, parks, bike rides, woods, dog walking, museums etc.
Yesterday I got caught in a very tight deadline and worked all day and I hang my head in shame that they pretty much spent the day in front of the TV or on computers/games as it poured all day. We did go out for an hour in the rain with the dog to run off some energy and play on the swings but still, screen time is normally limited.
Today I worked early, stopped at breakfast and we then did the Odean Kids club which got us home at 1.30. The agreement with them was I would work this afternoon.
I am now at tearing hair out stage. They have not stopped bickering and moaning they are bored, shouting, in and out of my office, and if they have asked for games once, they have asked a 1000 times.
I have said No to games, too many yesterday, in-fact I have said we are back to our normal pattern of weekend hour only. I am appalled they will not go outside and play, not even on the drive, not in the garden. Lego holds their attention for about 10 minutes, Nerf guns for another 10, outside that they both seem at a loss as to what to do.
What kind of kids are we bringing up?
It is a product of my own doing though as we hear these dreadful stories so we are constantly drumming into them they mustn't wonder too far, they mustn't talk to strangers, they mustn't even go 'home' with someone they might know if we are not there (based on what happened to tragic April Jones - I mean we sat both ours down and asked them what they would do if Fred's dad from their class saw them in the park and said he had been sent to pick them up by us - both said they would trust him - by the way I don't know who Fred is or his dad, I made them up!, but you catch my drift) so is it any wonder they wont go outside and play. Maybe I am slightly worse after working as a forensic scientist and dealing with cases like Holly and Jessica etc.
So we are now about to embark on a baking session with boy 1 and while that is baking I will be putting my skills into making an airfix plane with Boy 2.
It may sound better working from home but the truth is it is bloody hard especially with kids around.
I work, and if I say so myself I work hard. I work from home though for myself and most days sees me shut away in the little bedroom aka my office beavering away.
Childcare costs money, so we avoid it where we can, plus they both now find kids club really boring. At 9 and 6 the kids are pretty self sufficient and this year I was determined not to fall into the same trap as last year and work everyday of the holiday and then at 4.00pm rush out of the door with them in an attempt to feel like we had 'done' something.
This summer's plan was to work mornings, as I get up about 6am and make a start so 6-12.00 is a reasonable working day, boys get up 8.00ish and tend to amuse themselves. Then the afternoons are ours to wile away, parks, bike rides, woods, dog walking, museums etc.
Yesterday I got caught in a very tight deadline and worked all day and I hang my head in shame that they pretty much spent the day in front of the TV or on computers/games as it poured all day. We did go out for an hour in the rain with the dog to run off some energy and play on the swings but still, screen time is normally limited.
Today I worked early, stopped at breakfast and we then did the Odean Kids club which got us home at 1.30. The agreement with them was I would work this afternoon.
I am now at tearing hair out stage. They have not stopped bickering and moaning they are bored, shouting, in and out of my office, and if they have asked for games once, they have asked a 1000 times.
I have said No to games, too many yesterday, in-fact I have said we are back to our normal pattern of weekend hour only. I am appalled they will not go outside and play, not even on the drive, not in the garden. Lego holds their attention for about 10 minutes, Nerf guns for another 10, outside that they both seem at a loss as to what to do.
What kind of kids are we bringing up?
It is a product of my own doing though as we hear these dreadful stories so we are constantly drumming into them they mustn't wonder too far, they mustn't talk to strangers, they mustn't even go 'home' with someone they might know if we are not there (based on what happened to tragic April Jones - I mean we sat both ours down and asked them what they would do if Fred's dad from their class saw them in the park and said he had been sent to pick them up by us - both said they would trust him - by the way I don't know who Fred is or his dad, I made them up!, but you catch my drift) so is it any wonder they wont go outside and play. Maybe I am slightly worse after working as a forensic scientist and dealing with cases like Holly and Jessica etc.
So we are now about to embark on a baking session with boy 1 and while that is baking I will be putting my skills into making an airfix plane with Boy 2.
It may sound better working from home but the truth is it is bloody hard especially with kids around.
Sunday, 4 August 2013
May Day, May Day is there anyone out there?
Hello............
I wonder if I should start by introducing myself and adding myself to the Newbies group on BritMums as I have been crapper than a crap, crap thing at maintaining this blog!
However after our first proper holiday with the kids (age 6 and 9 - yes really) and actually stopping and relaxing, I have come back feeling like a different person. Corny but true. I even managed to turn my email off on my phone and didn't put it back on until we were physically back in the house, no calls, minimal texting - only to my mother to let her know we had arrived and then a few random ones to let her know some exotic Spanish Ebola type virus had not struck us down during our shenanigans out there - you know what mother's are like (of course I will be nothing like that :D).
Anyhow yes new me, meaning better outlook on life. As I have always said I miss my blogging but I have to work out what I like to do and what I need to do and I am afraid as is the case for many, work comes first. The 10 day break did show me though that I have become a bit of a workaholic and have lost sight of the things I enjoy such as marathon calls to friends, spending proper time with the kids, walking away from work and thinking 'it can wait until tomorrow'. When working in an office I managed it nightly, just because my office is the spare bedroom in our house, it shouldn't make a difference.
So I would like to say I will be blogging more, I would like to try! Maybe though the fact no-one seems to have missed me, shown no indication of having noticed my blog has been dead (other than one and you know who you are as we spoke the other night!), might be an indication I should just give it up! Only joking.
So chin chin (glass of wine in hand), here is to hoping I managed to actually do some blogging
I wonder if I should start by introducing myself and adding myself to the Newbies group on BritMums as I have been crapper than a crap, crap thing at maintaining this blog!
However after our first proper holiday with the kids (age 6 and 9 - yes really) and actually stopping and relaxing, I have come back feeling like a different person. Corny but true. I even managed to turn my email off on my phone and didn't put it back on until we were physically back in the house, no calls, minimal texting - only to my mother to let her know we had arrived and then a few random ones to let her know some exotic Spanish Ebola type virus had not struck us down during our shenanigans out there - you know what mother's are like (of course I will be nothing like that :D).
Anyhow yes new me, meaning better outlook on life. As I have always said I miss my blogging but I have to work out what I like to do and what I need to do and I am afraid as is the case for many, work comes first. The 10 day break did show me though that I have become a bit of a workaholic and have lost sight of the things I enjoy such as marathon calls to friends, spending proper time with the kids, walking away from work and thinking 'it can wait until tomorrow'. When working in an office I managed it nightly, just because my office is the spare bedroom in our house, it shouldn't make a difference.
So I would like to say I will be blogging more, I would like to try! Maybe though the fact no-one seems to have missed me, shown no indication of having noticed my blog has been dead (other than one and you know who you are as we spoke the other night!), might be an indication I should just give it up! Only joking.
So chin chin (glass of wine in hand), here is to hoping I managed to actually do some blogging
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