What the hell has happened to our finances?
Christ for the first time in years we literally are both at the very cusp of our overdraft limits and so is the joint account. Each time I flex the little bank card, I expect it to be spat out of the machine with a big buzzer going 'uhhhhh-uhhhhhh I don't think so', while I flush a shade closer to the red noses currently on sale and all those in the queue behind me look on sympathetically but with that look in their eye of 'thank god its not me, or stupid woman how can she let herself get in that position at her age' all the while eyeing my Radley handbag and Timberland winter coat and tutting loudly (both of which were presents I hasten to add from more than one person clubbing together - so there!).
I am not saying I am any better because I have not been but hubby is terrible with money and has no concept, however as I rarely actually let him see the bank accounts I guess some of that blame lies at my feet. Thing is if he saw it looking healthy he would spend, if he sees it struggling, he shouts and bemoans the fact he works so hard and he should be allowed to spend what he wants etc so vicious circle. But he is crap, he was invited sailing on his bosses yatch and he went and bought himself a brand new thick jacket, waterproof trousers, shoes and spent nearly £200.00 - why, because he didn't like the navy blue winter jacket with the detachable fleece hanging in our downstairs toilet worn about 10 times in 2 years, it didn't look the part, he wanted some new shoes and OK he needed the trousers. Why did he need a new jacket of £99 when he has 2 in the cupboard he never wears? He spent £700.00 on 2 tailored suits when he started his new job as he is apparently beyond wearing debenhams - does he wear them, does he hell, he never wears a suit jacket and both of those are now redundant as the trousers have both worn through on the bum after less than a year. See what I have to put up with. If I say no though, he literally sulks and doesn't speak to me for 4 days - healthy relationship hey! (and lets not even mention the credit cards which I have just transferred to interest free and have cut up so no more can go on them).
Anyhow sliver lining and all - i think being in this position has been a good thing, a big slap in the face and back to reality - we are living beyond our means, we have been silly and its now time to reign things in again, which we can do.
Hubby wants damned spreadsheets - yes spreadsheet which I apparently have the time to create and share with him.
I want to say £1742.00 a month goes out on all bills/mortgage etc, and after this we should be taking £200.00 out of the bank per week and spending that on food shopping and anything else we need. How are we spending more than that I don't know but it all adds up.
Over the past year or so I have become a right bugger for 'popping to the supermarket for bread and milk' and returning with at least 3 shopping bags. Only last week I went for milk and a light bulb and came home with some new shoes (only 9.00 in the sale but not necessary, but hey they were purple and nice), and I am constantly thinking things are a bargain so just getting - cooking stuff, bags, stuff for the boys, all not necessary. Hubby just spends, spends spend. most recently he parted with £130.00 for a F***ing TV remote - I kid you not. It does everything, its touch screen, it is enriching his life, he can control everything from one remote but it cost one hundred and flipping thirty pounds. I was NOT happy. This is what I mean, he thinks we have a limitless supply of money.
Anyhow I am now spreading the nutella a bit thinner, slicing the cheese less generously and not putting extra ham in the sandwiches! I am also clearing my freezer and cupboards, baking more and making the most of what we have in.
Any help or advice is welcomed
Its actually been a relief to get to this stage again as I think we needed it after too many years of living the good life.