My poor insulted nose

I have huge problems with my nose, its not so big that it disrupts my field of vision or small bugs and flies see it as an instant fun fair slide or anything like that, but more so with the whole breathing through your nose.

After years and years of being fobbed off by various doctors that it was sinus related, or a form of hayfever or some kind of allergy and trying every nasal spray on the market and decongestant known to man, I was eventually sent to see an ENT specialist back in August.  Within 5 minutes of me describing my symptoms, he knew what was wrong - it has only taken 30 odd years to get here (not that I am bitter).  One simple CT scan later confirmed that the septum speerating both sinuses at the top of my nose has collasped and not through snorting drugs either I hasten to add like Danielle Westbrook! I was probably born with it like that but it has worsened over the years.

Anyhow, they can correct it with surgery which was cleverly scheduled for the week before we moved 200 miles up the country.  The recovery period is about 2 weeks and as the Big Man was not allowed the time off work to move (dont even go there), I had to co-ordinate the whole thing with 2 small children by myself, and having my mum down to help me convalesce would of probably seen me being admitted to the local psych unit, as much as I love my mum, not good in a stressful situation! So needless to say I cancelled the op.

Since this move though I keep getting random nose bleeds especially when I bend over to tie my shoes up, not bad ones but enough to have me worried, so I mentioned it last time I was at the doctors and she said a quick appointment with ENT at the hospital would probably solve the problem. What a liar!!

Yesterday I happily went to see this ENT man, who proceeded to try and shove a camera up my nose which saw me slowly rising backwards up the chair, he commented on there being a blockage and when I explained about my septum his solution was to get me to sniff back a load of local anasethitic.  After 15 minutes I was choking and heaving as the back of my throat also went numb so it felt like I couldnt swallow, and each time I breathed through my mouth it set me off - it was a horrible experience.  To add insult to injury I could still feel the camera being shoved through my nose.

The outcome - 'I can't really see anything to explain your nosebleeds so I have put some chemicals up there to cortirise your nose and come back and see me if it happens again'

For the rest of yesterday and all of today I feel like someone has got my nose and all the useful bits behind it and put them through a mangle. It hurts to sniff, to breath, sneezing - well dont even go there, I can't touch it and it is still bunged up.  As a result I am swaying towards living with my horrendous snoring, after all it doesnt disturb me, and I am very use to not allowing myself to fall asleep in public, and bunged up nose, do I really want a major operation on it when a simple investigation and cortirisation has left me feeling very sorry for myself and in quite a bit of pain.