Wednesday 1 February 2012

Today is a new day

Today I have had a pretty rubbish day, I have felt very low, cried at anything and everything possible and generally felt very overwhelmed, lonely and not coping. I have not felt like this for a long, long time. How has it crept up on me, I am unsure. I think I know what has triggered it and I obviously have not dealt with it as well as I think I have.

I know I have got to take one thing at a time, and that has to be work, because if that doesn't come first then I don't get paid (family come first but that goes without saying).

I can't see the woods for the trees with work at the moment and am doing everything possible to avoid it or lose my concentration. I start something then have to go and look something up but it is enough to side track me and that's it, I am gone from work for ages.  I am writing this Tues night to post Wednesday and am going to ban myself from checking the blog or my email or looking at any other blogs until I have gone through my work.

After next week I may have a few days to regenerate before the next wave of things at the end of half term which has gone from 5 days in Miami to being moved to 4 days in Madrid and now seems to be 2 days in London. This may seem better and in some respects it is but at least with a long haul flight I get time to read and relax. However it means more time with the boys which is great. I need to recharge. If I still feel like this in a week i think I need to accept that I might need to pay a visit to the doctors, as I can't go on sinking.

So onwards and upwards. Today is the 1st February and time for me to pick myself up, try to complete one thing at a time and not 100 and get on top of things and start being nicer to myself!

Wish  me luck

3 comments:

Sarah Mac said...

Small steps RP, it's the only way and maybe write down things as you complete them (kind of a 'to do' list in reverse:) then you can see that you have probably achieved more than you think.

If a hug would help than I'm sending you a BIG one xx

Theramblingpages said...

Thanks Sarah, hug gratefuly recieved! I am a list writer anyhow, I have lists for lists!! I love my lists as it means as I complete things I can cross them off which gives me a big feeling of satisfaction. I got up at 5am this morning and have got on top of one project and am now making way eith the other main one so am feeling slightly better. I plan to get the maon project written up today which will leave me 2 clear days to concentrate on the other one.
And don't tell me off for checking my blog, I am having lunch so allowed myself 5 minutes - only time today so I am doing well!

Window watcher said...

I completely understand where you're coming from. At one point last Autumn, I even bought a book about procrastination because I thought it would help me out. I haven't finished it (haha...) but one great tip it gave me was to set an alarm for 40 minutes, or whatever you feel comfortable with, and tell yourself to work and only work for those 40 minutes then have a quick break (e.g. read a blog, check Facebook, make a cuppa). Then do the same again.
Sometimes I found that I'd be so engrossed in my work after the 40 mins that often I would reset the alarm straight away and carry on without a break. My brain appreciated the short bursts of work and it enabled me to break down what I was doing into manageable chunks.